Recommended Reading

Much of what has been written for couples sounds good in theory, but lacks the support of scientific research. However, there are several great resources available.

Fortunately, Dr. Scott Stanley and his colleagues have done their homework. Their program, the Prevention and Relationship Enhancement Program (PREP), "is one of the most comprehensive and well respected divorce-prevention/marriage enhancing programs in the world. PREP is a skills and principles-building curriculum designed to help partners say what they need to say, get to the heart of problems, and increase their connection with each other."

The folks at PREP recently launched a new program: Within My Reach.

"This new research-informed program seeks to help:

• Those in viable relationships, to cultivate, protect, and stabilize their union, including reaching for their dreams of eventually being married if they desire;


• Those in damaging relationships to leave safely; and/or


• Those who desire a romantic relationship and/or marriage in the future to choose partners wisely: to decide about, rather than slide through, major relationship transitions."

NOTE: To order Dr. Stanley's book, "A Lasting Promise," or for more recommendations, be sure to visit our new online Psychology Bookstore!

You've Got Me? Who's Got You?

Lois Lane screems as she hangs by one hand from the runner of a news helicopter teetering atop the Daily Planet building. Alas! She can hold on no longer and plunges downward toward the busy Metropolis street below.

Not to worry! Clark Kent rips open his buttoned-down shirt. Then Superman suddently swoops up from below and holds her safe in his arms. "I've got you," he reassures her.

Her puzzled response: "You've got me? Who's got you?"

That's a great question, and not just for Lois. Our culture's expectations for men are incredibly high. Men are expected to be able to solve just about any problem the world (or women) encounter. He is, indeed, a wonderful creation; but he's not God.

Superheroes, Past and Present

If you could be any person--real or fictional, past or present--who would you want to be?

We all look up to someone, but sometimes we don't give much thought to where we got our beliefs and values, especially when it comes to love and relationships. Our parents, for better or worse, provided us with an example of how things should be. We also get a lot of information from books and movies.

We've had superheros since the beginning of time.

We can learn a lot from superheros.

Adam & Eve

Following is the biblical account of the first couple. As you read, think about how you might have handled the situation.

Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, "Did God really say, 'You must not eat from any tree in the garden'?"

The woman said to the serpent, "We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden, but God did say, 'You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.'"

"You will not surely die," the serpent said to the woman. "For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil."

When the woman saw that the fruit of the tree was good for food and pleasing to the eye, and also desirable for gaining wisdom, she took some and ate it. She also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves.

Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the LORD God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the LORD God among the trees of the garden.

But the LORD God called to the man, "Where are you?"

He answered, "I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid."

And he said, "Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?"

The man said, "The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it."

Then the LORD God said to the woman, "What is this you have done?"

The woman said, "The serpent deceived me, and I ate."